A Joy Filled Home

By Nicole VanGelder

Christmas Movie Favorites

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Movies add a lot of Christmas cheer around our home. Some we gather everyone together to watch (sometimes with a special treat), others we simply play in the background as we cook, etc. Either way, they feel like familiar friends we see around Christmas & the Holidays just don’t  seem complete without them. Here’s our list (with our favorites in bold):

For younger kids:

Once  Upon a Christmas (Mickey Mouse)

Twice Upon a Christmas (Mickey Mouse)

The Toy That Saved Christmas

The Star of Christmas

Merry Larry & the True Light of Christmas

Saint Nicholas – A Story of Joyful Giving

Family Movies:

Charlie Brown Christmas

The Grinch (full length animated)

Klaus

Arthur Christmas

The Muppets Christmas Carol

The Santa Clause

Elf

Classics:

Shop around the Corner

Christmas in Connecticut

White Christmas

Miracle on 31st Street

A Christmas Story

The Original Grinch

Rudolph

Frosty the Snowman

Other:

Phineas & Ferb Christmas

Noel

The Santa Clause 2 & 3

The Prep & Landing Movies

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

*Polar Express: We watch this every year as a family. We have tickets for everyone to “get on the train”, we serve hot chocolate when they have it, and it’s a lot of fun. However, we also skip one or two parts that are a bit scary & not necessary for the overall plot.

The time after Christmas & before school starts again is also a great time to watch The Sound of Music. Plus, the Anne of Green Gables movies are a must for some of our family on or around New Year’s Eve while we do a puzzle, have fun snacks, etc.

12 Days of Christmas Family Fun – Secret Santa

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One of our family traditions during Christmas is that our kids do a “Secret Santa” with each other. We put each child’s name in a hat & they take turns drawing names.

The rules:

  1. They can’t tell anyone who they have, except mom & dad. (We keep a master list in case anyone forgets, too.)
  2. There is a minimum amount they must spend. Mom & Dad contribute to this, too. (The amount depends on age, as the younger kids don’t have jobs or the same ability to make money.) We don’t set a maximum amount, however. 
  3. You can also buy gifts for other siblings, if you want. Some years a child or two will buy a small gift for everyone, some kids make things. It depends on the year. There is no pressure to do this, but we also don’t limit their generosity either! Some kids LOVE giving gifts & it is important to them to do so. Other times a child will want to give a gift related to a special moment or connection they have with a sibling, even though that sibling is not their “Secret Santa”. We are okay with this. Our concern is that all in our home are treated very well, so we are not concerned with being “fair”.
  4. Even our youngest children participate (though mom & dad do most of the work when they are quite young).

We also create a list together of gift ideas with a reasonable price range & then we find a day (or two) to shop together! This is always so much fun!! While we go together as a large group, we split up when necessary to make secret purchases, etc. It seems like it would be difficult to do this & keep our secrets, but everyone does a good job of not paying too much attention to what others are doing & instead concentrating on their own mission of finding a gift for their assigned person.

I love this tradition because we have a lot of fun doing it, but also because it draws our kids’ hearts towards each other as they excitedly plan good surprises for one another. It also leaves them with treasured gifts & memories. 

Thanksgiving Family Fun

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It can be hard to manage all the details of Thanksgiving day. Either you are traveling and dealing with all that goes with that, or you are preparing a meal yourself. (I’ve done both, sometimes in the same year! And they both present their own challenges!) So, trying to create special family moments can feel like too much. The good news, though, is that there are a lot of easy ways to add some extra flair—and family fun—to your Thanksgiving.

Following you’ll find some of our favorite family traditions. (We don’t always do them on Thanksgiving Day. Some we do “Thanksgiving Eve” or the week leading up to it.) 

charlie brownCHARLIE BROWN’S THANKSGIVING:

Every year we watch “Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving”. Despite a shocking lack of parental involvement, the familiar faces of Charlie & his friends add a special element to our Thanksgiving. We have a “feast” with the Peanuts of the same food that Snoopy and Woodstock prepare for them—popcorn, jellybeans, toast and pretzels. 

THANKFULNESS TREE:

Shared in another post, you can find it here.

CANDY TURKEYS:

This varies a little year by year, but a few of our favorites have been:

four turkeysOREO TURKEYS:

These are the simplest candy turkeys and turn out so cute!

Supplies Needed: Oreo Cookes, Candy Eyes (available at most grocery stores), Candy Corn, Butterscotch or Peanut Butter Chips, melted chocolate or frosting

Directions: Place candy corn inside of the top of the Oreo cookie to be the turkey feathers. Then “glue” on the eyes and a butterscotch/peanut butter chip with melted chocolate or frosting. If you’d like, you can use the melted chocolate to “glue” the Oreo on top of another cookie to make the turkey stand up.  

 

OREO & PB CUP TURKEYS:Oreo & PB Cup Turkey

Similar to the above turkeys, these are slightly more complex, but even younger kids enjoy making them!

Supplies Needed: Oreo Cookies, Mini Peanut Butter Cups, Candy Corn, Candy Eyes, red frosting, melted chocolate or frosting

Directions: Insert candy corn into a Oreo cookie to be the turkey’s tail feathers. “Glue” the peanut butter cup to the front of the cookie with the melted chocolate or frosting. Then, cut candy corn and mold with your hands to create the beak (you can also use orange gummy candy like Dots for this, do the same thing, cut it to the right size and mold it to the shape you want). “Glue” the beak and eyes to the the front of the cookie above the peanut butter cup. Then “glue” the whole thing on to the top of a cookie that is lying flat to make it stand up.

RICE CEREAL TREAT TURKEYS: 

eliana's turkeyThese take a little more help for younger kids, but are worth the effort! 

Supplies Needed: Rice Cereal Treats Ingredients, melted chocolate coating (make your own with chocolate and shortening or find it ready to melt at the grocery store), candy eyes, red & orange fondant or frosting, cake pop sticks

Directions: Using the fondant, cut out orange triangles for beaks and small red “”wattles” to hang down from the beak. Then follow the directions on a box of rice cereal or marshmallows to make rice cereal treats. Then, form small squares or “turkey” shapes and insert a cake pop stick. (One of our more artistic daughter’s once crafted legs instead, as you can see in the picture. She used toothpicks, orange fondant and melted chocolate.) Make chocolate candy coating and dip the rice cereal treats in the coating until it is covered evenly. Last, add the candy eyes, nose & wattle. If you do this before it is dry, it should automatically stick. Otherwise, use a little more melted chocolate to “glue” them into place. Let dry on wax paper.

CINNAMON ROLL TURKEYS:

I know it is a little bit of overkill on a day already packed with food. But, we start each Thanksgiving with a cinnamon roll turkey. And, I cinnamon turkeyhave to admit, I look forward to it as much as the kids do each year! Plus, we add hard boiled eggs & its an easy & fun, connective breakfast on a busy day. 

Supplies Needed: Large canned refrigerator cinnamon rolls, bacon, small straight stick pretzels, candy corn, candy eyes, red frosting

Directions: Bake the cinnamon rolls as directed, first taking time to tuck in one end to create a flat face/neck. Then frost. Add cooked bacon in between the outer two layers on one side to the be tail feathers (see picture). Then add candy eyes, a candy corn nose, and a small drop of red frosting to be the “wattle”. As a final touch, add pretzel “feet”. 

I hope these add some special family fun to your special day!
Happiest of Thanksgivings from our family to yours! 

A Homeschool Thanksgiving

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give thanksHello, my friends!

I had plans—great plans!—to put together a comprehensive Thanksgiving Unit for you all to enjoy in the days approaching the holiday this year. However, you know what they say about plans. As our family has been going through Covid the past several weeks (or more accurately, covid has been going through our family) plans have changed! Lol. Thankfully, we are starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel and hopefully life will be returning to our version of normal very soon. However, I didn’t want to wait until then to try and get this together, as Thanksgiving is approaching quickly! 

The good news for you is that there are many resources available on-line to help you create a special Thanksgiving homeschool experience. Some years, we have gone all out and done entire units, other years (like this one) I just throw in one or two extra activities to celebrate the holiday. So, here are a few of the things we have done & enjoyed in the past. I hope you enjoy them too. Happiest of Thanksgivings to you all! 

A few of the Thanksgiving Homeschool Books we have used:

  • “Squanto: Friend of The Pilgrims” by Clyde Robert Bulla,  A simplistic chapter book that tells the story of Squanto (Tisquantum)’s life.
  • “Squanto’s Journey: The Story of the First Thanksgiving” by Joseph Bruchac, Illustrated by Greg Shed, A beautifully illustrated picture book for kids, told from Squanto’s perspective. 
  • “Almost Home: A Story Based on the Life of the Mayflower’s Young Mary Chilton” by Wendy Lawton  The story of what it was like to be one of the pilgrims, as told from a young, teenage girl’s perspective. 
  • “Thanksgiving on Thursday” a Magic Treehouse Book by Mary Pope Osborne

Also, fun for younger children: 

  • “In November” by Cynthia Rylant
  • “Pete the Cat: The First Thanksgiving” by James Dean
  • “The Thank You Book” (An Elephant and Piggie Book) by Mo Willems
  • “Thank You, Omu!” By One Mora (Not a thanksgiving book, but a great book about sharing and showing thanks.)

Writing Prompts:

  • It was the night before Thanksgiving and …
  • Thanksgiving told from the turkey’s perspective
  • This year, I am most thankful….
  • Imagine you were on the Mayflower
  • What is your favorite Thanksgiving tradition and why?
  • Thanksgiving Acrostic Poem 
  • How many words can you make out of the letters in “Thanksgiving”
  • List of 10* things I am thankful for 

*note: I adjust the number according to the age / writing level of the child completing it

Other:

  • Research the original Thanksgiving menu, bonus if you can find & execute a recipe
  • Research games kids would have played in 1621
  • Find out when Thanksgiving became a nationally recognized holiday. And, was it always celebrated on the the same Thursday in November?

 

Download a template for a Thanksgiving Acrostic Here Thanksgiving-Acrostic

Lined paper with a thanksgiving theme. Can be used with writing activities:  Give Thanks Paper and Thanksgiving Turkey Writing Paper

 

 

Proverbs 5:1-2 Family Devotional

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family devotional

Supplies needed: 1 egg, your family, this devotional

Optional: Bible, Journal, Pen/Pencil

Begin with a short prayer thanking the Lord for this time & asking Him to speak to you & teach you.  Then read and discuss the following: (Note: encourage everyone to participate as appropriate for their age level! This is important for retaining and understanding the material.)

Proverbs 5:1 – 2 “My son, give attention to my wisdom, Incline your ear to my understanding; That you may observe discretion And your lips may reserve knowledge.” (NASB)

“Give attention to my wisdom” “Incline your ear to my understanding”

What does it mean to do those thing? How do you do it? To understand, let’s think about the words used. Give attention. What is something that you pay attention to? 

Incline your ear. What do you use your ears for? How do you listen?

Another way to say this is, “My son, pay attention to my wisdom; listen carefully to my wise counsel.” (NLT) 

Pay attention! Listen carefully!

When you are doing something carefully, you are taking care with it.  We have an activity to do that will help us to remember what it means to be careful. 

Have everyone stand up in a circle. Take the egg and pass it around the circle. Then take a step back & pass the egg again. Repeat this as long as you are comfortable. The goal is to not break the egg. (If it does get broken, that is a lesson too! So, simply clean it up & use it as an example during the rest of the devotional.)

We treated the egg with care, because we didn’t want it to get broken. If we are trying to be careful with something, it changes how we treat it. How do you think we can treat God’s Words with care? 

One reason we are supposed to treat God’s Words with care, is because of what it will lead to. According to this verse, if we do that, then we will “observe discretion and our lips will reserve discretion”. What in the world does that mean? 

Well, let’s read it another way. In the Message Bible, it says it this way: “Then you’ll acquire a taste for good sense; what I tell you will keep you out of trouble.”

We were careful with the egg because we didn’t want to break it. We should be careful to pay attention to God’s Words because we want to live well. He knows best how to live. He knows what actions and values will lead us into good lives—and He wants us to live good lives! He wants things to go well for us! So, it’s important that we listen to Him so we can learn His ways. If we do, the result will be that we live good lives. 

Close in prayer. Thank the Lord for teaching you and leading you all into connection with Him. Pray over your family that you all would know Him and walk according to His ways all your days. 

Cultivating Thankfulness

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thamkfulI recently started practicing thankfulness on purpose. It isn’t that I wasn’t thankful before. In fact, I often found myself thanking the Lord in amazement at His goodness, especially during times of worship & prayer, while tucking my kids in at night, or other moments of awareness of specific blessings in my life. However, I wasn’t purposely cultivating it. It was more of a background noise. Something I took for granted as being true, not something that I gave much attention to making sure was proved through my behavior or consistent heart attitude. 

What I’ve discovered is that practicing thankfulness—cultivating gratitude—is quite different. So is its impact. For me, growing a grateful heart has also grown my patience, love, and joy. Quite simply, I am happier and my actions display it. 

This shouldn’t surprise me. After all, studies have shown that thankfulness makes a positive impact on your mental & physical health. Things like lower blood pressure, happier relationships, and reduced depression are just a few of the positive impacts of gratefulness.*

This shouldn’t surprise me because people like Oprah have been declaring the benefits of thankfulness for years. Even more, it shouldn’t surprise me because the Lord has been recommending it even long before that. In fact, He doesn’t simply recommend it. He commands it. 

1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells us ‘in everything give thanks”. In greater context, it says (starting in verse 15) “See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people. Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

To sum up: seek good for all people (always!), Rejoice (be glad!) always, pray always, give thanks always. The key word being always. 

Most of us do these things sometimes, even without trying. But, always? That requires some intentional effort. Which means it isn’t always easy. 

One practical way that I have been practicing thankfulness seems easy enough—and it is on the surface. What I do is this: I list three things that I am thankful for at the start of my devotional times. That’s it. A simple list. I write them out in my “quiet time” journal. Not so hard, right? 

And, some days it isn’t hard at all. My heart is already there & the words just pour out in all sincerity. But, other days? Ehhh. Maybe I’m tired. Or frustrated. Or grieving. Maybe I’m crabby. Or, maybe I’m simply not fully engaged. Even then it is easy enough to list out general reasons for thankfulness. But, if I do that, I’m just skimming the surface. And frankly, I don’t think it counts. I certainly don’t feel happier or calmer or better off. And, I also don’t actually feel thankful.

But, when I dig deep? Especially if I don’t feel like it? It’s amazing the impact it has—on my attitude, my day, my heart. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that my life is changed because of it. One example (of which there are many): One day I was irritated by one of my kids & I chose to be thankful for them. Not just “God, I’m thankful for so & so” in a general way. But, a “I’m going to sit in this until I can actually be thankful & feel it sincerely” kind of way. It wasn’t long before my irritation melted away and genuine care replaced it. I remembered what a gift it was to be their mom & how precious my time with them is. It changed my attitude, and my behavior followed. I was fully present & thankful for the time. I was much more patient and engaged than I would have been otherwise. 

This is just one example. I won’t say that practicing thankfulness has solved all of my problems or made up for all of my shortcomings. But, there is no doubt in my mind that it has not only made me happier, but its also made me a better person. Just as the Lord surely knew it would when He asked it of me. It will do the same for you, too. Try it! You’ll see. 

My challenge to you: Choose to purposely cultivate thankfulness in your life, too. Find a time / practical way to add this to your daily routine so you won’t forget and will be consistent. (Consistency is key!)

The most important thing, though is: Be sincere. I mentioned that I list off three things, but one thing—one sincere thing—is really all you need. 

“The heart that gives thanks is a happy one, for we cannot feel thankful and unhappy at the same time.” 

—Douglas Wood

*Other benefits include: Better sleep, improved decision-making, enhanced positive emotions & self-esteem, more energy, less cortisol (the “stress hormone”) & increased oxytocin (the “bonding hormone”), slower neurodegeneration, etc. 

Sources;”Joynomics: The Study of Joy & Progress”; “Giving thanks can make you happier” Harvard Health; “31 Benefits of Gratitude” Happier Human; “28 Benefits of Gratitude & Most Significant Research Findings” Positive Psychology 

 

Willing to Say No

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Saying NoMy husband is not afraid to say no, and I am so thankful. Early in our family life, we were greatly impacted by a couple of families who lived this way, too—willing to say no to even “good” opportunities because it wasn’t what was best for them. I’m so thankful for their example! Because of it, I have realized how important it is to be thoughtful about our time. Rather than committing to something quickly, we take the time to consider if this is in the best interest of our overall family life. 

This takes courage because, for whatever reason, there can be so much pressure & fear associated with saying no. “Everyone else is doing it.” “What if this is my only opportunity?” “Others will be so disappointed.” Etc.

But, there are a couple of things that can help with this process:

  1. Faith.  Saying no actually requires a great deal of faith because you are trusting that the sacrifice will be worth it. You are making a decision right now for a future that you can’t yet fully see. You are trusting that living according to values will bring about good results in the long term. It often means trusting the Lord to make your way for you at the proper time, too—instead of forcing your own way or saying yes at the wrong time or to the wrong thing, out of fear that no other opportunities will come. 
  1. Clear Priorities. A lot of the time even “good” opportunities require a no. The reason for this is that we all have limited capacity & time. If we say yes to everything, we sacrifice our best for anything because we simply won’t have capacity. We will also end up wasting our time. I’ve heard it said that wise people “invest” their time, rather than spend it & I agree! This means that you recognize that your time is limited & valuable & so you don’t just use it on anything. Instead, you invest it into the people & things that are most important. I find that often when I feel like I have the least time, it is the most important to actually stop & take some time to reexamine my life, reminding myself of the values & goals that are most important. When I do this, it becomes clear what adjustments I need to make to once again be using my time well. 
  1. Flexibility. Seasons change. Circumstances change. What is a yes in one season easily becomes a no in another, and vice versa. And, this is okay! Good even. It’s a sign of growth. But, it’s important to be thoughtful in every season about the way you are spending your time. Don’t assume that something you committed to in the past is still the best fit now. Likewise, it may be that now is the time to say yes to something that you didn’t previously have the capacity for. Which, leads me to my next point…
  1. Courage to say YES. Saying a real yes can take just as much courage as saying no! I think one reason why it is so easy to let our lives be filled with distraction, letting those “urgent” tasks take over our days, is because it is actually scary to say yes. Saying yes to a person or an opportunity, stepping out to take a risk—this requires courage because it might fail. We might fail. Or, at the very least, we may be incredibly uncomfortable as we step into opportunities that require growth & vulnerability. The good news is that I’ve found that when I do this, even if I fail, the failure is never wasted. I learn. I grow. Something happens in the process that makes me see that the process was the point anyway, not the end result. The Lord is masterful at taking our journey & using it to shape us into the people He created us to be! (And, who we are is much more important than where we are!)

Learning to say no with ease & yes with courage will bring great freedom into your life. It is something I am still working on! But, I’m so thankful for those that have helped me to understand how important it is to do so. I am also thankful that God’s grace is with me in the process! Even though I won’t get it perfectly right all of the time, I can trust Him to guide & help me in this process. You can too! 

The “Magic” of Christmas Earrings

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I bought these earrings on an impulse. (I mean, can you even plan for such a thing? 😂) Well, actually my hubby did. ❤️We were running a quick errand & they caught my eye. Instant love. I mean, obviously. Who could resist such magic? 😉 But, silly as they are, they have a deeper meaning for me.

See, I had was aware that our home was in need of a little extra joy. Some sparkle, if you will. Though I am more aware than ever about how much we have to be thankful for, this year has been tough for everyone—even homeschool families.  I knew a couple of my kids in particular were feeling the strain of it & missing their friends, the freedom of life “prepandemic”, etc. Plus, I don’t know anyone who isn’t ready to see 2020 behind us! So, I had already resolved to really embrace & enjoy this holiday season, which is why the earrings really captured my attention in the first place. But, I didn’t realize how much they would come to mean to me. 

The earrings are ridiculous, of course. But,they have actually made an impact in my home. Each time I wear them, I tell the kids to get ready for a great day, because how can any day with Santa Clause earrings not contain some extra Christmas “magic”. The amazing thing is that because of this, these silly earrings are a tangible reminder to me to: Choose Joy. Enjoy the “small” moments. Carry a song in my heart. (And often on my lips.) Create some fun. Etc. So, in a way, they really have become “magical”! 

Now, you are probably wishing you had magical Christmas earrings too (check at Target, if they no longer have them I’m sure you can find plenty of other “magical” items😉😂). But, as you know, it isn’t really the earrings that are magical. It is the heart posture. See, life is made up of big & small moments. The magic of Christmas earrings won’t go a long way during the big moments. The good ones don’t need them and the hard ones? Well, there is no “magic” that makes those easier. A pair of silly earrings do nothing in the face of having to say goodbye to a loved one, losing your job, facing health issues, the breakup of a relationship, etc.  Instead, during those moments it is often only the grace of God & the support of people that get you through. But, most moments in life aren’t “big”. Instead, life is primarily made up of small moments. And, thankfully, those moments are transformed by this type of “magic”. 

Cleaning up after dinner becomes a different experience when your family does it together, while singing & dancing along to Christmas music. Laundry is actually a peaceful, soothing experience when it is done with a song in your heart & a twinkle in your eye. A night is transformed when you put the “to do” list aside & call a friend.  I could go on, but you get my point. There are endless small moments that stretch before us each day. By choosing joy, our lives themselves become more “magical”.

A Month of Self-Care // Thankfulness

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I Thess. 5:16-18 (NLT) Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

NASB Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

Thanks = be grateful, feel thankful.

Talking about practicing thankfulness feels kind of well, silly, to me. I don’t know why. I blame the fad Oprah (I think) started when I was growing up. Suddenly “Gratitude Journals” abounded & everywhere I went people were recommending that you write down something you are thankful for every day before you went to sleep. Now, here’s the thing: Oprah—or whoever—was absolutely correct. Thankfulness is an important value to cultivate and practice! The Bible even commands it (see above). I think, along with my own orneriness, I was reacting to the idea that thankfulness is somehow a stepping stone to more. I don’t think anyone intentionally taught this. But, somehow I would hear people talking about thankfulness along these lines: Once you learn how to be content & thankful for where you are / what you have then you will be “promoted” into more. As though fate was just waiting for you to begin using those gratitude journals & suddenly you would become rich / famous / loved / powerful, etc. Again, I don’t think this was intentional. But, it left a distaste in me all the same. The truth is that thankfulness isn’t a key to promotion. It isn’t something to be manipulated in order for you to get your way. However, it will change your life. The reason thankfulness will change your life is because it will change you. For example:

A day doesn’t go by when I am not thankful for my family. Truly. Here’s why: My family is an unexpected, hard “earned” (for lack of a better word), amazing, better than I could or would have planned, blessing.

See, I didn’t think I wanted to have children. My becoming a mom started as I walked in obedience to the Lord—with much fear & reluctance. And the result was that I discovered motherhood to be a greater blessing than I ever could have imagined. I discovered parts of myself I never knew. I grew intimately connected with the Lord. And, of course, I ended up with these amazing people! My journey hasn’t been easy—there have been many losses & much heartbreak along the way. Yet, the Lord’s goodness has not only sustained me but been my glory each step of the way. So when I say my children are a gift, I mean it in the very core of my being. This deep & abiding thankfulness has added such a joy to my days. And nights. Because of this heart attitude, being up in the night with my youngest (far after she “should” have been sleeping through the night) had a sacred element to it, my heart looking at her & nearly bursting with thankfulness that the Lord had given her to us. And it isn’t just that. I could go on and on with examples, but you get the point. It isn’t that I never have my “moments”. We all do. But, I can say with 100% confidence that the thankfulness I have in my heart has elevated my experience, my home, and my relationships more than can be calculated.

The same is true of my marriage. I am well aware that Jamey & I almost didn’t make it to this point. I not only can’t imagine my life without him, but the thankfulness that I have for him and our marriage brings so much joy & life into our relationship. It also creates such a confidence in the Lord, in His ways, & His provision. I am also filled with such great anticipation of hope & confidence in our future! But this isn’t just because things are good now. I learned thankfulness in the midst of the worst times. It felt like the world was falling apart around me and yet—God. He was with me. He sustained me. He forgave me & gave abundant mercy. He offered hope & promises for the future. He faithfully loved me & Jamey both. I will never get over His great kindness towards me! And, really, that’s what thankfulness is. It is an awareness of God’s goodness. Always. That He is faithful & trustworthy & ever so good.

So, my self-care tip today is to practice thankfulness. Do it in a gratitude journal. Do it in your prayers. Do it in creative or simple ways. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you do it in your heart. Don’t practice thankfulness hoping life will change. Maybe it will. But, it won’t matter, because you will change. And once that happens? Well, you will find that perhaps your life was already everything you needed & even more.

A Month of Self-Care // A Clean Slate

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Ephesians 5:30 “Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted.” (The Message)

There are a lot of reasons not to sin. It creates all kinds of messes. It hurts people. But, there are no reasons quite as moving as this one. Sin disrupts the most intimate part of your life.

The Holy Spirit is with us always—shaping us, comforting us, teaching us. When we sin, we are taking Him for granted. We are disrupting that relationship. We are disrupting such an intimate connection that it is actually impossible for it not to affect us negatively, even if we don’t realize it. It is like a poison that permeates its way through our lives. After all, the wages of sin is death.

But, Jesus. Jesus died to make us free. He paid the penalty for our sins! He made the way for His Holy Spirit to become an intimate part of us! What a tragedy when we continue to labor under the delusion that either:

a) sin is not a big deal or,

b) it is too hard/scary/uncomfortable/fill-in-the-blank to confess our sin, make it right, & be free.

Jesus didn’t die to bring us freedom someday. He died to bring it to us now. So, this self-care tip is both incredibly hard & the most easy thing you will ever do: Make things right.

Stop carrying sin around! It might take great courage to do this. However, the simple truth is that Jesus is the one who did the actual hard part. Our part is to acknowledge what He did by honoring it—& Him—by not living under the shadow of sin.

How do we do this?
1. Know what the issue is. Maybe you already know something that you need to make right. A confession of wrong doing. Admitting a mistake. Reaching out to a broken relationship. Or, perhaps nothing comes immediately to mind. In that case, simply ask the Lord if there is something. The Holy Spirit knows & He will show you. (You don’t need to make something up if it isn’t there!) If there is a list of things, that’s okay! Don’t be discouraged, simply start to make your way through it.

2. Take appropriate steps to make it right. Confess. Apologize. Make amends. If you aren’t sure what you are supposed to do, ask for wisdom. Again, you can trust Him to give it to you! Then, simply do what He asks. If you are unable to do so for some reason—for example, you are no longer in touch with the person—do your best & then entrust it to the Lord. Commit to making it right if & when you can. (Then don’t be surprised if they unexpectedly cross paths with you!)

A couple of things to keep in mind:
First, it isn’t on you to fix everything. You can’t force someone to offer forgiveness or mercy. You may not be able to fix something, even if you had a hand in breaking it. Your job is simply to do your part. Then trust the Lord with the rest. He isn’t at work only in you. He is working in the lives of those around you, too. Trust Him with the process & outcome.

Second, there is no such thing as too little or too big. If something comes to mind, don’t dismiss it because it doesn’t seem like a big deal. Follow through with it! You have no idea how important it might be. It is usually in the “little” areas that our character is formed & proven. Likewise, there is nothing “too big”. It may take courage for you to face something that seems so far out of your control or ability to make right. But, you are not facing it alone. The Lord is with you! And nothing is too big for Him.

There’s a lot more that can be said on the subject, but I think only one last thing is needed. Living with a clean conscious is truly one of the best gifts you can give yourself. It will bring you peace & soothe your soul like few things can. It carries a deep & abiding joy. It reconnects you to the “most intimate part of yourself” & creates the pathway to true health & wholeness. A new year is upon us, don’t let it come before you’ve done this.

A clean slate. A fresh year. The possibilities are endless.